Self Esteem

in #selfesteem7 years ago (edited)

In sociology and psychology, self-esteem reflects a person's overall subjective emotional evaluation of his or her own worth. It is a judgment of oneself as well as an attitude toward the self. Self-esteem encompasses beliefs about oneself, (for example, "I am competent", "I am worthy"), as well as emotional states, such as triumph, despair, pride and shame. Self-esteem is attractive as a social psychological construct because researchers have conceptualized it as an influential predictor of certain outcomes, such as academic achievement, happiness, satisfaction in marriage and relationships and criminal behaviour. Self-esteem can apply specifically to a particular dimension (for example, "I believe I am a good writer and feel happy about that") or a global extent (for example, "I believe I am a bad person, and feel bad about myself in general"). Psychologists usually regard self-esteem as an enduring personality characteristic ("trait" self-esteem), though normal, short-term variations ("state" self-esteem) also exist. Synonyms or near-synonyms of self-esteem include: self-worth, self-regard, self-respect and self-integrity.

Many early theories suggested that self-esteem is a basic human need or motivation. American psychologist Abraham Maslow included self-esteem in his hierarchy of human needs . He described two different forms of "esteem": the need for respect from others in the form of recognition, success, and admiration, and the need for self-respect in the form of self-love, self-confidence, skill, or aptitude. Respect from others was believed to be more fragile and easily lost than inner self-esteem. According to Maslow, without the fulfillment of the self-esteem need, individuals will be driven to seek it and unable to grow and obtain self-actualization.
300px-Maslow's_Hierarchy_of_Needs.svg.png

However, according to Jose-Vicente Bonet, people with a healthy level of self-esteem:

  1. Firmly believe in certain values and principles, and are ready to defend them even when finding opposition, feeling secure enough to modify them in light of experience.
  2. Are able to act according to what they think to be the best choice, trusting their own judgment, and not feeling guilty when others do not like their choice.
  3. Do not lose time worrying excessively about what happened in the past, nor about what could happen in the future. They learn from the past and plan for the future, but live in the present intensely.
  4. Fully trust in their capacity to solve problems, not hesitating after failures and difficulties. They ask others for help when they need it.
  5. Consider themselves equal in dignity to others, rather than inferior or superior, while accepting differences in certain talents, personal prestige or financial standing.
  6. Understand how they are an interesting and valuable person for others, at least for those with whom they have a friendship.
  7. Resist manipulation, collaborate with others only if it seems appropriate and convenient.
  8. Admit and accept different internal feelings and drives, either positive or negative, revealing those drives to others only when they choose.

On the other hand, Jose-Vicente Bonet also opined that a person with low self-esteem may show some of the following characteristics:

  1. Heavy self-criticism and dissatisfaction.
  2. Hypersensitivity to criticism with resentment against critics and feelings of being attacked.
  3. Chronic indecision and an exaggerated fear of mistakes.
  4. Excessive will to please and unwillingness to displease any petitioner.
  5. Perfectionism, which can lead to frustration when perfection is not achieved.
  6. Neurotic guilt , dwelling on or exaggerating the magnitude of past mistakes.
  7. Floating hostility and general defensiveness and irritability without any proximate cause.
  8. Pessimism and a general negative outlook.
  9. Envy , invidiousness, or general resentment.
  10. Sees temporary setbacks as permanent, intolerable conditions.

Conclusively, it is imperative that every human being, with no exception, for the mere fact to be it, is worthy of unconditional respect of everybody else; he deserves to esteem himself and to be esteemed.

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Beautiful topic. Very instructive.

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Very great post.

I was also reading about locus of control. How people who have internal locus of control are better in life because they believe they can make changes in their life rather than external locus of control.

I struggled with low self-esteem during my life until I went to therapy and realized I am in control of my thoughts and action. I have good self-esteem and have noticed I can make changes to my external world to get what I want, I just need the goals and a good mindset to achieve them.

Also, with the low self-esteem part, I thought I took criticism well. But I realized after my therapy that I wasn't. When I had low self-esteem, I believed I was right and they were wrong, and I had science to back me up. Now, I agree with someone criticism and acknowledge that "Yes, I could be wrong." I could see how someone could turn their low self-esteem into someone else problem. Meaning it isn't me that I will fail, it is because someone else made a mistake. I rationalized my low self-esteem and I could see how someone would see that as good self-esteem.

Thought I mentioned a point of view. Great post.