I circumvented a drug test yesterday

My fellow Steemers and Steaming hot hotties, yesterday I had another interview with a shit tire shop that was chomping at the bit to pay me eleven dollars an hour so long as I could pass a pre-employment company drug screen, I despise these as I am high every day without fail. No need to worry though I have planned for this day, and made my girlfriend quit smoking pot some time ago, I have procured a state of the art electronic device called the Urinator, I handed her the bucket and said, “here piss in this bucket”, and she did! The urinator is an electronically heated pouch which I inserted her pee into and threw it down my pants.
I have a lot of funny stories about beating these stupid tests, I think they are useless but hey if you’re not smart enough to cheat a drug test then maybe you shouldn’t be allowed near machines, tools or even people for that matter. So I loaded it up, put the batteries in it and went to deliver. A funny thing happened when I went to put my belongings in the safe, I had spotted someone else’s pee jar, not wanting to be blamed for it I promptly turned it in before giving my sample. I guess it was the last guys way of saying FU to the system as it was in a container which wasn't in use at this lab.
I must admit I get a little nervous but this will be like the seventh test I have circumvented, and circumvent I did, you all are looking at the new lube tech in some shit hole tire shop. Please read my stuff and pass it along so I can quit my day job. I didn’t really want to work there, but I have a need for some hard-manual labor right now so I can eat. I crave the feel of tools in my hands, the icy cold winter as it contrasts with the hot engines and smell of oil and gasoline. It’s almost as good as a woman’s touch. I live a hard life, please support.
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